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17 April 2010 @ 05:15 pm
Short fiction: New Years Day (Charles/Jonas)  
Story is based on the occurrence of the ‘blue moon’ on 31th December 2009. This was the night a second full moon occurred in the same mont.

Titel: New Years Day
Author: Moonshape
Rated: R
Pairing: Charles McFeral/Jonas Eberhardt
Warning: Male relationship. Self-wounding
Words: TBA
Note: Charles McFeral belongs to Moonshape, Jonas Eberhardt to Gesundheit!


'I want to be with you
Be with you night and day
Nothing changes on New Year's Day
On New Year's Day.'
New Years Day, U2

The night is dark and the cellar I’ve already spent so many hours of my life in is cold. But I am not. I lay naked on the concrete floor, with no blankets covering me, but I am not cold. My body is shivering and trembling. But I’m not cold.

I lay curled up on my side, my arms crossed over my chest. Every few seconds, a violent shock runs through my body, causing my muscles to contract. It is almost time. Not only can I see it, as my eyes are half opened and staring through the small window, but I can feel it. Not much longer now…

I have spent hours in this concrete prison. Ever since I arrived here, I’ve been dumped into this place to await the full moon. This place keeps me save. It’s underground and the walls are thick. The door is made of steel and the small window which allows me to look above the ground is barred. Not even a werewolf can escape from this place.

I don’t care this is my prison. I know it’s for the best to keep me in here. But the thing that is killing me is the loneliness. I have no one. My family was killed a week ago. Tonight is New Year’s Eve and I’m alone. It’s just me and the moon.

I wonder what will await me next year. I have no solutions. I don’t see any point in my life anymore. I want to be dead. I want to die. I don’t believe in any ‘being with my loved ones after death’ thoughts anymore, because I know they are gone and they will never return. I just want to die to stop my suffering. I welcome death.

And as the moon rises, my body feels as if it’s dying. If it only were... The pain is excruciating and unbearable. It’s not as bad as it was the first time when I transformed, but it’s still so mind-breaking and intense that I scream and whimper in pain. Soon, Charles will be pushed out of my mind and hidden somewhere in this changing body. The wolf will take over and I will scream until the moon will set again. Until then, I will just have to wait.

~***~

Sun rays that have broken through the window cast a beam over me. As I start to regain consciousness, I start to tremble. My body is confused and it hurts. It feels as if I’ve torn all my muscles into pieces. I can’t even find the strength to raise my eyelids.

I hear the locks of the door turn and the hinges creak as it is pulled open. I hear a pair of boots descend the stairs, the soles clicking when they touch the surface of the steps. I know that walk because there is a distinctive limp audible in it.

He approaches me and crouches down beside me. I feel a stinging jab in my upper arm and how that wonderful drug spreads through my veins. It feels as if a weight is lifted from my shoulders and as if I finally surface after being held underwater.

He quickly examines me, opening one of my eyelids to flash a flashlight past my eye. He feels my neck, chest, hips, arms and legs for fractures. I know I have no broken bones this time. It has happened twice before. But not this time.

He then turns me onto my back, wrapping his arm around my shoulder. His hand is placed underneath my armpit while he hooks his other arm under my knees. He lifts m up as if I’m a bag of feathers. I weigh nothing to him. He has an extraordinary strength, even for a man with a weak leg. He ascends the stairs quite easily. I’m not light. I’ve put on some muscles after I first changed, causing me to gain weight. But Jonas has the strength of an ox and he carries me to my room without any effort.

Things have changed, that’s for sure. A few months ago, he would have been less gentle, carrying me roughly to cause me more pain. But he has eased down and he’s a lot more caring and gentle now. I appreciate it.

I am thankful for all that he’s doing. He’s the only one in the house that takes good care of me. The others don’t care about me. Only Jonas does. He protects me from the other vampires, for I can be rather vulnerable. He takes care of me when I’m sick. He feeds me when I’m hungry. And most of all – he’s there for me when I need him.

He lays me down on a soft bed and I can smell it’s my own. He eases my head down in a pillow and he wipes my hair out of my eyes. I hear him leave the bed but I also hear a faint click of the lock of his bag. He rummages through it and he returns to my bedside. I can hear him shift and a few seconds later, something wet and soft is pressed against a wound on my arm. It stings, but I don’t utter a sound. This pain is only minor compared to what I’m used to.

He continues to clean my wounds and he wraps some bandages around the deepest of them. He covers me with the sheets before he continues with his examination. Something cold is pressed against my chest and he listens to my slow heartbeat. My heart is big and strong. He shifts the stethoscope and listens to the other side of my chest. He measures my blood pressure, which is too high for a human, but I am completely healthy. He measures my heart rate as he presses his index and middle finger against my wrist. I can hear the ticking of his watch.

He sighs deeply and he places my arm back down.
‘Happy new year,’ I hear him mutter and I feel how his fingers stroke my face again before he gets up. He is about to leave me when I grab ahold of his hand that has been caressing me.

‘Stay,’ I whimper, without opening my eyes. I don’t want to be alone. Not now. This has been the loneliest week of my life and I don’t want it to continue. So I cling onto the only person who takes care of me: Jonas.

He sits down on the bed again and holds my hand. He begins to sing, very quietly. And I at once feel how I calm down. Even though his hand is cold, the patches of skin where he’s touching me feels warm and at ease. The feeling spreads through my body like warmth. I feel trust and comfort. His voice is like music to my ears. It makes my brain numb which feels good. The touch, voice and ketamine are what draws me to the vampire. He is my enemy, but when someone has no one left, he would even befriend his worst enemy.

'You've had a rough month,' he quietly talks to me as he strokes my hand. 'Two full moons - that doesn't occure very often. It is called a blue moon be,-'

'Not my biggest concern,' I interrupt, as I roll onto my side again. My back is aching and laying flat on it hurts too much.

'I know,' he sighs and I feel his other hand stroking my forehead again. 'I know, Charles. But you know why it happened. You acted against the rules. The Council had to punish you.'

'All of them?!' I exclaim and I push myself up onto my elbows. I have no idea what gives me the strength but I feel I'm growing angry. 'All three of them? They were only 10, Jonas.'

'The Council doesn’t judge by age. What you did was severe enough for taking them all away from you.'

'They were my family,' I moan as I drop myself down in my pillow again. 'They were my family,' I continue to rant and I pull my hand back from Jonas'. 'My family.'

'You had to leave them behind, no matter if they were dead or alive. You couldn't return to them.'

'But they're - dead.'

'Yes, Charles. And it's because of your own mistake.'

'My mistake,' I whimper and I bury my face into my pillow. 'My - mistake.'

'You have to live with it, Charles,' he says and I sense his face is closer to mine. 'It's over - they're gone You'll have to move on.'

'But - they're gone. I - I've got no one.'

I feel how he takes my hand again and he runs his icy fingers past my jaw and when he speaks, I can hear he's close - whispering into my ear:

'You've got me.'